Does Anybody Else just “happen to be gay”?

Often when I tell people I am gay, they are a bit taken-aback.

I suppose they are most surprised because I don’t really subscribe to a lot of the stereotypes associated with “lesbians” ( or gay women, a happier way of identifying my sexuality).

Not that I feel like it’s important to subscribe to any of the heterosexual women stereotypes. I certainly don’t feel like I’m “passing”. (I don’t consider myself to be putting any effort into “passing”.) When it comes to clothing, I love wearing heels and skirts as much as I walk around with my hands in my pockets. (At that, you might be thinking, “You, and Coco Chanel”. But when you’re wearing pants, it does seem more of a young boyish way to stand.)

Don’t think for a second I’m not completely grateful for the people who fought to make sexuality a “non-issue” (and who are still fighting, because, let’s face it: sexuality is still an issue for many).

I’m neither ashamed of my sexuality, but I also don’t consider it to be my “master status”. I consider myself to be living a relatively normal life, but I just happen to be gay.

I think a lot of the reasons stereotypes were created was to help us identify each other. (Stereotypes probably play a larger role in “gaydar” than we choose to admit.) It’s easier to “pick up” and make friends if you know someone will accept you before you put yourself out there.

Do you willingly participate in the stereotypes of your sexual orientation?

I bet anyone reading this has more than a few responses to that question. Please leave a comment so we can start the discussion!

Tags: Coco Chanel, gay stereotypes, gay women, gaydar, hands in pockets, heterosexual stereotypes, identifying my sexuality, lesbians, master status, sexuality a 'non issue'